'Nesting" and Surrogates

Momma cats and dogs do it. Expectant birds do it. And, if you’re like many human moms-to-be, you’re doing it. What are we talking about? Nesting--preparing your "nest" for your soon-to-arrive baby! The difference here is that you are the surrogate mom and so you will not be taking home this particular sweet baby. His/her intended  parents will enjoy that life-changing moment.

However, one of the many questions we do get asked here at  Shared Conception, is about nesting and the  surrogate.  Does the surrogate mom still get the nesting instinct  as do the majority of pregnant women? 

The answer in a nutshell  is a resounding "YES."  For the majority of surrogates, nesting happens and yes, their house gets cleaned and all their DIY projects actually happen. After all, your body doesn't know that the baby won't be permanently yours, it only knows that it's pregnant.

This  nesting instinct during pregnancy can be quite powerful. Productive, as well — driving a legion of pregnant mommas to sweep out the garage, pair up all the stray socks that have wandered into the Laundry Room Bermuda Triangle and brighten the bathroom grout lines with a toothbrush. If the nesting instinct hits your nest as you're preparing for childbirth, make the most of it — after all, you never know when this instinct will strike again. 


Here are a few nesting experiences from surrogates.

"Oh, it's physical for me.  Nothing is safe when I get nesting.  I make checklist after checklist and they usually get done by the time the baby is born.  I'm sooo looking forward to it." Ida. 

"Nesting does happen in a surrogate pregnancy! I went nesting crazy with DS and the house stayed so clean and organized! I even got up the motivation to go through boxes of junk and take stuff to goodwill, which I never do when I'm not pregnant! Ha ha." Ally

"I had major nesting on and off the whole time. Which was really bad since I was on bed rest. My hubby thought I was insane sometimes. It was nice. I made six trips to Goodwill in my Ford  Expedition." Sarah

"Yep, I nest  a lot!!  It was nice to have that burst of energy to do things like clean out drawers and closets and not have it used to make a nursery!  All that energy got to benefit the family quite a bit. :-)" Amity

Of course, every surrogate's body is different and nesting may not occur in each and every pregnancy. But it's nice to know that  even though this specific baby is being nurtured for the intended parents, a good majority of surrogate moms still go through the ritual of nesting while pregnant. Shared Conception encourages all surrogates to enjoy these moments as they all form the unique experience of helping another family complete their family.



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